THE FRUITS OF BITTERNESS

Bitterness is one of those things we might be guilty of harboring within our hearts, but do not like to admit someone suggest that we might be guilty. Often, those who are guilty of displaying bitterness - when confronted - will make excuses and try to rationalize their behavior. More often than not, the bitter will blame their actions on another, often explaining that they have acted as they have only because someone else has treated them dishonorably or unfairly. What is missed
in the attempts at rationalization is the fact we are only admitting we are, indeed bitter!

The apostle Paul wrote, "Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you." (Eph. 4:31, 32). After reading this, let us now fully admit that bitterness has no place in the life of a Christian for Paul clearly says such behavior should be "put away" from us. Let us also admit that any attempts at rationalizing such behavior are
simply unacceptable.

I know we have all most likely suffered on the wrong end of poor treatment by someone close to us, or someone we trusted,and it is after we have been so treated that we are most likely to harbor those bitter feelings. Maybe a brother insulted us or simply did not take us seriously when we were trying to speak to him; maybe someone took credit for something you did; maybe you didn't get asked to teach that class you wanted to teach; maybe someone is getting more attention than you or is more successful. For you preachers, maybe it was a case of being asked to leave because of one member's opinion; maybe you think you are not respected or recognized for the work you are doing in the congregation; maybe someone said your last sermon was rambling and they didn't get anything out of it, after you stayed up late working hard to make it both sound, according to the Scriptures, and relevant to the members' lives. We could go on and on with the various reasons why brethren become bitter, but what we need to do is consider how to recognize bitterness, how to prevent it, and how to overcome it if it has managed to creep into our hearts. But we also need to recognize the fruits of bitterness should we resist admitting we are guilty. We need to know that such behavior has consequences.

Recognizing Bitterness. Sadly, one of the most common reasons for a display of bitterness is plain old envy. If we remember the story of the prodigal son, we might recall the reaction of the older son upon hearing that the father was celebrating the return of the younger (Luke 15:25-29). His reaction illustrates some of the common results of bitterness: envy, anger, and discontent. The older brother was bitter because - after all - he hadn't run off and wasted his inheritance
like his younger, more foolish brother! He was angry because he didn't think the younger brother deserved such treatment. And all his behavior may have resulted from being envious of what the younger brother was receiving from his father (cf.Luke 15:29b). These kinds of feelings are present - though they may not necessarily be expressed out loud - when bitterness is in our hearts; we feel like we have been treated unfairly [which may or may not be true] and we get angry that we are unable to "right the wrong" or just get upset because no one seems to care.

Friends and brethren, I can speak from experience that bitterness is not the road you want to take. Years ago, I was faced with a situation that could have left me very bitter toward some people I had thought were good friends and faithful brethren. Without going into details, I will just say that it was an unpleasant experience and one I will not likely forget anytime soon. What did I do afterwards? I will tell you very honestly that it was tempting to lay everything out so the world could see the ungodly behavior of others; it was tempting to lash out and throw some very harsh words back at those who treated me very harshly and unfairly; it was tempting to purposefully embarrass those involved because their lies were so obvious to all. But I didn't do any of those things. Instead of being bitter towards these individuals who had treated me so harshly [and
who were supposed to be my brethren], I prayed for them - and for myself. I removed myself from the situation [about 1500 miles away, to be exact] so I would not be tempted to show bitterness because of what had happened. I got over my bitter feelings even faster than I first believed, and I am glad I did. I haven't forgotten what happened, but I am not bitter about it. If I had let bitterness take over, I would be a miserable person today!

Preventing Bitterness. The first step to prevent bitterness must be taken long before a situation arises that might cause bitterness. That important first step is the simple matter of having love for one another. That's right! And I don't mean the superficial "I-love-you-I-love-you, too" kind of love, but a genuine love that is borne out of a genuine concern for the souls of others. It is the kind of love Jesus expects us to have: the same degree to which He loved us and gave Himself for us (cf. John 13:34).

When Paul defined love for us in the letter to the Corinthians, he said love "suffers long and is kind…does not envy…is not provoked, thinks no evil" (1 Cor. 13:4, 5). Love causes us to be patient with others and treat them kindly; we will not have envy toward others though we may not enjoy their same blessings, and we will not think evil of them but give them the benefit of the doubt. Adam Clarke says particularly of the resistance to provocation that it means we are "not made sour or bitter." Friends and brethren, one cannot have bitterness toward another if we truly love them with all our heart! And let us admit now that love is the only 'preventive measure' we can possess, for it is the antithesis of bitterness. One who has love cannot be bitter, and the one who is bitter cannot love.

Overcoming Bitterness. So, what if we fail and bitterness creeps in? All is not lost! Like any other sin, the solution is to replace the bad with the good. Like any other sin, we should pray for its removal and for forgiveness for even holding it in our hearts, and then we should strive to replace those bitter thoughts with a genuine concern for their soul, as well as for our own. We need to know that no one can enter into eternal life holding a grudge; to get in, you must let it go. In the end, there is nothing we could conceive of that would justify bitterness because the price is our eternal salvation. As John said, "He who does not love his brother abides in death. Whoever hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him" (1 John 3:14, 15).

The Fruits of Bitterness. Please do not take this subject lightly, for bitterness has been the cause of much unnecessary division and harsh feelings among brethren and the destruction of a few churches; it has divided nations, households, and ended friendships; it breeds ill will toward others and hinders the work of the church. Bitterness is a wall that stands between us and our brethren, between us and Christ, and between us and eternal life. We must understand that bitterness
is not the mark of a true disciple of Jesus Christ, but of one who has a worldly heart (Jas. 3:15, 16).

When we try to excuse our bitterness or try to justify it, we do ourselves no favor. It is nothing to be laughed at or swept under the rug, but to be admitted and eliminated, if present. It must be "put away" from our lives if we truly seek to please the Lord and obtain the eternal reward. -- 

Steven Harper

Truth - is as old as God -
His Twin identity
And will endure as long as He
A Co-Eternity -- Emily Dickinson